Pre-election round up

The media frenzy around the election has reached fever pitch with breaking news constantly reminding us whenever Brown has picked his nose or Cameron has topped his tan up. It is hard to keep up and I wish that BUBB had had the foresight to launch a commission to appoint a taskforce to consider the possibility of writing a special report on how umbrella CEOs could keep up with events after they had happened. Despite there still being no mention of the umbrella sector by any of the parties.

Below is a highlights package of some of the more interesting incidents.

Much was made of Cameron pulling an all-nighter on the campaign trail. The last time a Tory leader felt they could cheat sleep everything went tickety-boo so I am fine with that.

BREAKING stories on this included:

Cameron stays up all night and watches entire second season of the Wire on DVD

Cameron planning an all-nighter camped outside number 10 tomorrow night. Will try and sneak in when GB collects his milk

Cameron admits speed should be legalised. "This stuff really works"

Although after Cameron repeatedly cancelled interviews on various radio and TV channels (except Sky, naturally) "in case he was asked difficult questions and was expected to be accountable" the Queen considered postponing her promised interview with him on Friday, and maybe cancelling it indefinitely.

Tactical voting has been a big issue. Surely all voting is tactical, but if you are going to vote tactically make sure it is more Mourinho than Keegan. Labour MPs in marginal seats have called for tactical voting. "Please vote for us - we need this job" . Ultimately I reckon that if you want to keep the Tories out by voting tactically, the tactic should be don't vote Tory. If everyone in UK sticks to that we'll be OK.

Other top stories included:

Brown seen consulting a lawyer with expertise in "squatter's rights"

Following the 20/20 World Cup farce, in event of hung parliament election to be settled by Duckworth Lewis method (which supporters of PR would say is already happening)

Obama mulls over plan to drop DC from Washington if Tories get in

Brown says he'll only give up keys of No.10 if Cameron and Clegg throw theirs into the ashtray as well

LATEST: Apathy poll: 30% or so of electorate who can't be bothered to vote get ready for 5 more years of moaning about the government

Cameron: "Read my lips cos your children won't be able to read anything else once I have slashed education budget"

Jim Callaghan's estate issues writ against Manish Sood for slander. Maggie Thatcher issues counterwrit.

I must say I am looking forward to results night now. But wait. No. I don't have Sky HD. How will I be able to see clearly who has won the election? Though I suspect that if I did watch it in HD, that would probably stand for high dudgeon. And if results aren't favouring the Tories will Sky just ignore them, proclaim Cameron as PM and hope no one cottons on?