While taking a break from scouring Turkey for tonic water, I was reading BUBB's great new publication (honestly, it is great, I'm not just saying that) on How to Become a Brolly Sector Chief Executive. It has a wonderful set of tips on how to get to the top and stay there. The main one being that you wait for Feudal recruitemnt guru Donald Holding (have I mentioned him before?) to snaffle you then get headhunted every 3 years into a succession of increasingly higher paid roles. Or you could do what I have done and wing it for 10 years and hope the trustees never quite have the balls to sack you.
Other top tips are outlined below.
Motivate your staff
Constantly refer to them as "brainy" and "brilliant" in your blog. Take them out on the lash.
Blame it all on other umbrella groups
Hubert Carrington or Dylan Twirley make cracking scapegoats. Personal attacks through a blog is the professional way of engaging with colleagues in the sector.
Make all sorts of rash predictions and statements about what you will do even if it is unrealistic.
Communicate, and communicate again
Repeat things on your blog until they become established as fact.
Right, I am off now. These Turkish churches won't look at themselves you know. And if someone could send me some tonic water as an emergency food parcel (To Robin Bogg, Alanya, third beach on the left) that would be great. I am gagging for a g'n't.