Gnat Pee and the famous five

I have been very busy this week having meetings with loads of brilliant individuals, all basking in the glow of my own ubiquitous omnipotence.

Bogg Society continues to get on my tits. But it was interesting to see the government's Bogg Society guru, Gnat Pee, dipping his toe into the Twitter waters. Using the pseudonym Nat Wei (do you see what he did there?) Gnat asked for suggestions of 5 people he should "follow" to gain insight into Bogg Soc gubbins. 5 isn't many but then Gnat is a very busy man. Trying to turn rhetoric into substance requires the commitment and optimism of an alchemist trying to turn air into gold. And it is interesting that his approach to research was to empower a community to do it on his behalf to save him the bother. Very Big Society.

Anyway, imagine my surprise and horror when the first five names were duly followed and mine was NOT AMONG THEM. I ask you. I invented Bogg Society before Dom Blonde got his grubby mits on it and my subsequent repeated renouncement of it means I am ideally placed to comment with credibility.

Fortunately Gnat has now followed a further tranche of experts. And I am number 6! Yes that's right - a person who some people can hardly believe actually exists is number 6 in Gnat Pee's famous 5. Gnat - as one of the unofficial advisers to the government's adviser on Bogg Society, I won't let you down. But don't expect me to come round to your flat in the Shoreditch ghetto for a glass of homebrew. I do have standards.

I am sure Gnat will have noticed that Jez Topgun of the Old Crumbling Foundation, who is very very clever, has savaged the Bogg Society. He states that it is "in danger of being reduced to slogan, with ministers failing to establish what the programme will entail and the public baffled by the few things seen so far".

As the architect of some of New Labour's airy fairy buzzword policy cul-de-sacs, Topgun is certainly speaking from experience.