The below image of my Libyan cousin Colonel Gampddafi has raised questions about my own involvement in his murderous regime.
I would like to go on record and state that I do back him or his callous attempts to use the brolly as a propaganda tool. True, like him, I have managed to remain in power despite constant abuse of my position for personal gain and growing unpopularity.
And make no mistake about it, I would be off to Venezuela in a shot, especially if there was a conference and a jolly there that I could get the members to pay for.
But I was strongly opposed to the Brown government selling brollies to Libya, supposedly for the protection of the people but which are now being turned against them as weapons.
And I wasn't involved in any deal to send a rogue Libyan gamp back home from a Scottish umbrella stand when its spokes were irreparably bent. Even though people such as @kevfrost talk about a murky "British Paraplui-eum deal for Libyan br-oil-lies".