Using Simon & Garfunkel song lyrics as a weak metaphorical substitute for inspirational leadership

The cuts have created a sense of doom around the sector. That and people blogging about them. Doom and gloom are ideal weather conditions for umbrellas so I wanted to use my speech to last week's BUBB annual conference to point people away from the sunny side of the road.

If I may be indulged (like you have a fucking choice), this is a precis of the key points from my speech, peppered with insight and clever Latin references. I finished it a couple of hours ago, over two days after I started.

I used the theme of "Leadership - sometimes it is better to say nothing rather than speak for the sake of it". Oldies like me will remember that wonderful Simon and Garfunkel song The Sound of Silence. But I have never taken that as a hint. And no-one would say we are not being poured on by troubled waters. Brollies have to show leadership to help bridge the troubled times and bring us safely to Jordan's shore, nice and dry. Though what Katie Price has got to do with it is anyone's guess.

I said:

"Bollocks to this. Bring on the rain. Ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad 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ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, 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infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum, ad nauseum, ad infinitum...

If anyone has made it this far, well done, but there's no punchline.