Sunday 31 October 2010

The undeserving poor quality brollies

One of the more reprehensible features of the recent debate on cuts has been the emergence of those who believe that poor quality brollies deserve to suffer.

My recent lecture (did I tell you about my lecture? It was very good. No, not good, long) reminded members that not so long ago many people believed there were deserving and undeserving umbrellas. And anyone listening to a recent Any Questions would have heard the revolting modern expression of this by Dingo Starr, a man of whom it is hard to think of anything other than crazed loon historian.

Poor quality brollies do not shirk work, they just need support to enable them to provide adequate shelter. There is a real problem that many umbrellas in deprived areas are being painted as workshy idlers scrounging off their owners and not doing a proper day's rain protection. Sure, some do try and hide away in the corner for fear of getting wet but they are a small minority. If we're looking for brollies not pulling their weight and contributing to the UK much better to focus on the expensive ones who avoid British rainfall by sheltering in tax havens.

Testing times indeed for the umbrella sector but we are up for the challenge. Indeed the situation seems to have brought the best out of me. It is as if I have suddenly remembered what my job is - representing the interests of umbrellas and NOT myself. It may make for less of a car crash of a blog but so be it. I expect my spoofer Stephen Bub is kicking his heels wondering what to write because he has nothing meaningful to parody as I reel off blog post after blog post of largely sensible and well thought out wisdom.

I expect it won't last, especially once the pre-Christmas networking kicks in!

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