Back from a break in Boggnor Regis, whose name is derived as everyone knows from the Olde English for King Robin of Bogg. Despite trying to keep a low profile I was caught up in the celebrations. Bunting everywhere and flags. Not for the Queen but for the government u turn on the Brolly Tax which I singlehandedly engineered. Yes, I can give credit to everyone else as much as I like but we all know that it was me what really won it. George Osborne just couldn't face the prospect of another letter from me to the Times.
But I seek no thanks. Success is its own reward. And I was spotted by the policy paparazzi wonk Craig Trevor as these pictures illustrate.
I did over indulge a little bit but can you find a Doctor at 3 in the morning? No. Bloody doctors with their curing people on their own terms nonsense.
But for now, as I discussed with Brolly Minister Rick T'Hurd we need to move on to the important business and issues facing the umbrella sector. Such as keeping my profile high by finding something else for me to bleat on about all over the media. These peerages won't bestow themselves. As I know, having already tried that method.